I'm 29 years old and the mother of a beautiful 10 year old daughter.  My life has been greatly impacted and permanently damaged by alcohol. I have cheated on my husband multiple times and done many immoral things while drinking.  My own child has seen how irresponsible I become when I drink.  On one particular night I remember cleaning the kitchen, locking the outside doors and tucking her into bed, but I have no memory of anything that happened after that.  I woke up not knowing where I was, how I got there or where my daughter was.  These "blackouts" happened often and I began to withdraw more and more over the next year as I suffered tension and anxiety so intense that I was in actual physical pain. At times I couldn't even walk.  No one around me understood alcoholism and most of them thought my behavior was due to low morals.  

 

For nearly two years I knew I was an alcoholic and needed to get help, but alcohol was everywhere, all around me, on television, on the shelves in every grocery store and restaurant. I thought I was doomed.  I realize today that alcohol cannot be avoided in our society and not everyone is alcoholic like me.  I realize today that family cannot save me and I can't move to a world with no alcohol.  For the suffering to stop, I have to make the decision to recover for myself. 

 

My brother in law overdosed on drugs a little over a year ago, went into cardiac arrest, and is in now in hospice care after living in a vegetative coma for months.  That incredibly sad story is an inspiration for me to recover, I will not allow his death be in vain.  Despite our strained relationship and my ongoing health issues, my husband supports my recovery. He has committed to not drinking at all and believes that even after all our difficulties, we can make it.  

 

I'm on day 120, sober without a slip!  I can't reasonably expect people with no addiction of their own to understand my illness or my excitement about recovery.  I'm learning to ask for help and and accept support from people who have real experience with alcoholism and addiction.  I'm learning to take suggestions.  I'm also feeling better and better about myself every day and my daughter is getting her Mom back.  I reached out to the Sober Life Project to share my story and my hope with others who are suffering with this terrible and deadly disease.  We can make it together!

 

Kimberly, Colquitt, Ga